I’ve put up with my fair amount of crap in my life, but this year is just taking the cake. My boyfriend has been away since June, my dad has been diagnosed with a brain tumour, started having seizures and has now been through major surgery, yet I’m being some sort of glutton for punishment as I’m still trying to help others out.
The main part of my online life is the forum I’ve been running for the best part of 3 years now. I’ve been a member for around 6 as well, and have met some of my best friends through it. Older people I know think it’s fucking mental that I can share intimate details of my life that I wouldn’t dream of sharing with my best friends I see often, but it’s all based on trust. I don’t run off and tell Chris or anyone else about what the girls have been saying, and I trust they would do the same, so I don’t mind looking to them for help, considering that’s what the forum is for. I’ve leaned on them more in the last 6 months than I ever have before, although I haven’t been able to actually post much, I keep in touch with a good few of my staff members, and they’re always there to help me out. It’s amazing.
My problem is that although I run Girl Support, I still don’t feel like I’m helping out other people much and I always want to do more, but right now I find myself needing to take the advice, rather than giving it. I just need someone to take me in their arms, tell me it’s all going to be ok, and just be there to listen to all my worries, no matter how daft they are.
It’s fucking tiring sometimes.